Working Out

Anyone out there on a diet or is it just me? I swear that is how it feels sometimes. And to be truthful, I don't actually go on an official diet. I just do my own thing, maybe it's called the crazy diet. I think dieting and losing weight are really more about managing portions and exercising, but really there is no way someone is going to tell me what to eat, how much to eat and when to eat it. Unless I am going to die, that is. When it comes to portion control I simply halve what I would normally eat for a meal. So if I have a sandwich and chips, then I cut my sandwich in half as well as the chip portion. Just to clariy, I only eat the one half of sandwich and chips, I don't just halve it and then set it aside for my second lunch. I do this with every meal and then I try to replace all, but one sweet a day with healthier food choices. For example, I eat a bowl of cereal for breakfast, sandwich or salad for lunch, a yogurt or dried fruit for afternoon snack and then dinner and a small dessert after. I love dessert. It really should be part of each meal. I have learned not to deprive myself of cravings. If I have a craving it is easier, less guilt and less food if I just give in. So let's say I want a Snickers bar for a snack. If I don't eat one I tend to scrounge around and eat for two hours just thinking about the Snickers Bar. Instead if I just go in and a Snickers Bar; voila - craving over! I also work out 3 times a week. Theoretically. I just started two days ago. I went to the gym this morning and I was one of four people actually there. It was like paying $24 a month to go to my very own gym. It was great! For the first time I got to actually look around. Y'know how you aren't supposed to look at other people while they are working out; or talk on an elevator - I digress. So anyway, I craned my neck all over the place and took advantage of the fact that I could oogle at the gym. Course after about 10 minutes I was dying on the eliptical machine. You can't look and die at the sametime. The trainer at the gym sold me on this latest and greatest eliptical machine. Um yeah, but my muscles still have to work. Ouch. I also got in the pool, which is the latest and greatest - salt water pool. Uhm, yeah that hurt too. I swam competitively for 10 years and really haven't done much of anything in the last 10 years. Does that mean it cancels out the 10 years I did swim and workout? Everyone I know brings up the fact that I should love swimming. Get over it. Today is a new day. I used to love getting up at 4am to go to practice. No really, I did. We would work out doing circuits for 30 minutes, then get in the pool for an hour. By the time I was driving home, the sun was rising and the air was fresh and cool. I loved those mornings! Course then I would go back after class and swim for a couple more hours in the afternoon too. And on Saturdays, although most weekends were spent at swim meets. With my workout history you would think working out would be pleasurable, down right easy. No. And I repeat, no. I can not believe how hard it is to workout. It takes me three times as long to actually start feeling good at the gym. And it also takes me that much longer to actually see results. Well, actually I have found I "look" skinnier the minute I start thinking about going to the gym. The real results actually take a few weeks. I think there should be a gym you can workout so you look good at the real gym. Then when you go to the real gym I can work out for a professional swim team. So by the time I am actually on a master's swim team again I will be in the best shape ever. But in all honesty, if I make it to the gym I have worked out; if I work out that is just icing on the cake (fat free of course).

This is the first year I have actually felt old(er). I can't believe some days how tired I am. There are nights I am praying for my son to go to bed, so I can hit the sack. Some nights my husband will take pity on me and make me go to bed early. For some reason I feel guilty going to bed early, even if I have stayed up late every other night. And when I say late I mean midnight. I am really a day person - from 11am-4pm. Though I have my good days and bad days too. Then there are the nights I can't seem to get tired. These are always followed by the mornings I can't get up.

Overall in that last year I would say the best days off are laying in bed with my cats and a good book, although I have probably had the most fun scrapbooking.

So Day 2 of going to the gym. And a new blog.

Already I feel slimmer.